The Lesser Characters

Over the past few months, if you`ve been paying attention, you have come to realize that this website is run by people with an obsession for the great Hitchhiker`s Guide, even if we are extremely lazy, remarkably unreliable, and probably rather dim. With that, we`re even going to do in depth character studies on those who might come along for a few chapters in only one book, because we have a niche to fill in this market for the curiously obsessed: completely useless knowledge combined with hearsay and a dash of fabrication. One might, if one were needlessly antagonistic to our purposes, argue that there is no point, since after all, we`re only making stuff up; this is depressingly short-sighted. "Where`s your imagination boy?" is a question asked often enough of me back in those youthful days of traipsing through the forest and frolicking in the fields of my native Zanzibar, before the man pulled it all down. And now I turn that question to all you doubters, all you who would rather read something worthwhile than spend five more minutes on this bit of insignificant rambling. Where, pray tell, is that imagination of yours that would allow you to approach this with anything but scorn and contempt? Dammit man! Find it within and jump on our bandwagon of frivolity, join us as we make stuff up! Oh, and all the rest of you who, for whatever reason actually are interested, we dig ya. Even if you do need a life (I`d rather not dwell on what that might say about us).

Prak

Facts:
  • This guy can laugh for a really long time
  • He likes Arthur Dent…and frogs.
  • He spent rather a longish time locked up in a court, to which he had been compelled through a curious set of coincidences, to tell "the Truth, the Whole Truth, and Nothing but the Truth."
  • He is dead.
Assumptions:
  • There`s no point in assuming anything with Prak, the man has had a rough go of it, what with knowing everything ever, so we`ll exempt him from this.

Marvin

Facts:
  • Stunningly brilliant
  • Stupifyingly depressed
Assumptions:
  • He needs a girlfriend.
  • It would be best if his girlfriend was unable to ever hear him speak.

And for anyone who objects to calling Marvin a minor character, well, it was really just because I had this file open when I thought of him.

Rob McKenna (Rain God)

Facts:
  • He is a miserable bastard
  • Clouds love him
  • That love is not reciprocated
Assumptions:
  • He needs a different career.

Thor

Facts:
  • Is also a God
Assumptions:
  • Could kick Rob McKenna`s ass

Slartibartfast

Facts:
  • Doesn`t like time-travel
Assumptions:
  • Is a real prude